no play by play today. short, brief, to the point.

today was a good and busy day. shailee got to come play with us. we had lots of fun. cali loves her big sister. when jordan came to get her we hung out for a little bit. it was nice to socialize!

today has been a day of hurt too. blehh,, i hate this time of month. im super sick and have thee worste head ache of my life. i took a nap with my baby girl today! mmm. i love naps.
then landon, kyler, hayley, and i had a fire and roasted marshmellows and had s'mores. now going to go tanning :D yess. those endorphins are much needed.

super duper excited for my date with brandon next weekend. its like all i can think about! :] dinner, movie and a night under the stars. eek! butterflies >!<

oh p.s. i was looking through morgan jewlers catolog, and they have the most prettiest ring! i think i might just get it for myself for mothers day ;) its a malibu sunset! and i want it.

when you stop chasing all the wrong things, you give all the right things a chance to catch up

im finally letting go and not looking back cause im not going that way. i know that i have alot to offer and once i really figure myself out ill be better than i am now. i deserve someone who is going to love and cherish me AND my daughter every second of the day. who isnt going to want to miss a thing. whether that be in 6 months or 10 years, it will happen. im just glad things were made clear and i dont have to waste my time for a peice of shit :). its all about me and cali. and i want to thank everyone who has, or is, or is going to help me until i can get on my feet and become stable. love you all. xoxo thanks for all the support.

shailee peyton,,

if this ray of sunshine doesn't brighten your day...

i don't know what will. :)

learn the smiling stages 1-5
from shailee,

shailee is such a doll.

she was super nervous at the begining of the shoot.

sherry was looking through the pictures to see if we got any good ones,

and when shailee saw herself she got right back infront of the camera and was a natural.

she is such a sweet girl!

 i love her as she was my own.

and thats the truth.

and cali jannette gray

 got lots of super cute close ups of cali.

she has beautiful eyes.

family pictures,,

just some of my favs.

Shailee was really nervous, didnt get a good of both of them together :/

i love them with all my heart <3

cousin emery just loves cali!

best picture of all three of them ://

on the go go go go go!!!!!

up, down, and all around. here, there, everywhere!!! can i ever get a break!?
i love being busy but i love some free relaxing time too! i need it!
a nice spa day that includes; full body massage. mani & pedi. and a spray tan at the end would be the most amazing thing ever right now! i definitly need it.

cal called me today. we had a good chat :) im glad he called. it was good to hear from him, and hear his fun stories.

going to bbed early tonight. another go go go go go day tomorrow :p

goodnight kisses

oooooo!!!! how did i get so lucky to have this beautiful little angel
quick shout out to calvin gray, thanks for helping me bring this little girl into this world. :))

so its like 11:30 and cali is still awake just wanting to play. i made hea bottle and layed her in her crib. she layed there and cooed and talked. then i could hear her kicking her legs. tossing and turning. so i got up to put her in bed with me just to snuggle but she was already asleep. so i gave her a kiss on the cheek and she smiled from ear to ear :) it was thee cutest thing. i love her so much.

ive got a pocket got a pocket full of sunshine.
ive got a love and i know that its all mine :)
LOVE YOU CALI FLOWER <3

be content with being single today. love who you are and love the life you live. you have family and friends who are always there for you. you dont need a girlfriend or boyfriend to make yourself feel good. be happy your even alive and have the things you do have. it could always be much worse! dont make a mistake mistaking your blessings for a curse.

so sick of eating nasty shitty food. i want a real nice homecooked meal that makes me feel good after i eat it. instead of switching off between; egg in a bonet, pb&j, an egg sandwich, and a box dinner thats old. they make me sick after and i want to puke.  we seriously dont  have anything that i can cook! 8O

once upon a time marathon tomorrow?

i think YES!!!

my two favorite girls in this whole world,

this is my favorite picture!

i love both these girls with all my heart!

shailee peyton

cali jannette

on our way to the mall, eating a nana

cali eating and getting her beauty sleep before pictures,

like she needs it...psht

pretty sure im the coolest sisters mom there is :]

she wanted to drive, so i let her

she is the best litte mama ever!

she loves to help with cali.

& she loves her sister!

i wish they could get together more often.

saturday at teigs party and easter egg hunt

happy birthday grandpa!

while becki and i went to easter shop,

 cali and bert decided to go to bed :]

with cousins jaxon and jocelyn

oh no, her toys are falling.

hoppy easter :]

playing with the easter eggs.

she absolutely hated the grass.

truth: we have fun together!

easter weekend,,

tiegs birthday party and the easter egg hunt at the williams. it was alot of fun. i saw alex there...i did the right thing breaking up with him haha. and thats so mean to say cause on the inside, he is really sweet, kind, passionate, and smart. but he is a freak on the outside. it is not attractive at all. EMO.
berts bday dinner was yummy. becki made tater tot casserole. one of my new favorite things. it was fun being with the family.
easter day, grandma dawnie had an easter egg hunt for cali and emery. (pictures to come) we had lots of fun looking for eggs :]
we went to bert and becki's again and played lots of fun games. and we had an easter egg hunt. all the grandkids got a basket. cali got: juice, a rattle doll, binkis, and a stuffed animal lamb. and then they made a wnderful dinner. it was so yummy! they know how to cook. stephen and kiersten were being so funny. every one was laughing so hard.
monday: busiest day of my life. not really. but jordan was supposed to bring shailee over at 9:30, cause eastons baptism was at 10. 9:30 came around...no shailee. 9:45...no shailee. she didn't come till like 10:15. and i was freaking out cause i had already missed eastons baptism. plus when she dropped her off she wanted to talk forever. but im just glad that she really brought her. so jordan left and i ran shailee upstairs and got her dressed to go. we made it in time for the confermation and baby blessing. stephen did a great job. we went out side took lots of pictures. and then we went to the park and had a pic nic. all the kids played and had lots of fun. after a couple of hours of that, i had to hurry home and get cali and shailee ready for pictures. shailee is such a good little girl. she listens to everything i say. we did her hair, got their clothes on, then i had to get ready. and we ran out the door. we went to the mall thinking we were going to have plenty of time. made a stop at mcdonalds....yeah right. long story short, we were late. we got there and started taking pictures right away. emery dawn was a little booger. she just wanted to play and run around. :p and shailee wouldn't smile. i was surprised cali was the good one ;] sherry was looking through the pictures and shailee was looking at them with her and she saw how cute she was and went infront of the camera and just started smiling and being such a little model! i am SO excited to see them. i already know that they turned out awesome. thank you sherry!!! after pictures we went home and i got shailee ready and drove her home. :[ then i went home and me and cali passed out!

holy cow, this weekend was crazy!!! update coming soon, lots of pictures too!

the crew

"these shoes would fit....if my feet were bigger"

love you guys.

i had so much fun.

we all had such an amazing night!!! i dont know why we ever stopped hanging out. i seriously havent laughed this much in so long. my friends are hilarious! we played ping pong, drove around and had ourselves a good time.
thank you to my grandma for watching cali so i could have a wonderful night out.
and to my parents for letting us use the house and be roudy.
pictures to come :)

excited for the rest of the weekend.
easter egg hunt and tiegs party tomorrow. then, becki invited us to berts birthday dinner.
sunday we are going to bert and becki's for easter dinner with the fam. which im very grateful she invited us. cause i miss everyone already. and cali needs to be with both sides of her family.
monday: kerri and stephen invited us to go to  eastons baptism, and jaxons blessing. and little do they know. i have a little surprise for them :) shailee.
monday is when we are getting pictures of the girls. i talked to jordan today and she is planning on bringing shailee over monday at 930. so i really hope she goes through with this. cause she is super flakey, and i will be livid if she bails.

my smiling little angel,

on her way to work with mommy

she loves the jumper,

honestly, i don't know what we would do with out it!

she has so much fun working out her legs

and getting them strong :]

such a diva!

today

hayley and i took the girls to the mall and got their outfits for pictures on monday. i am so excited. they are going to be absolutely perfect :) 

i just hope that jordan doesnt bail on lettting me have shailee for pictures.

my heart seriously just hurts right now,, :\ <\3

one of the greatest friends,

is brandon sehestedt. we have been friends for 6 or 7 years now. when we were kids we would hang out with all of our friends and play night games and have fun. as we grew older things changed. everyone went seperate ways. a couple weeks ago i got the crew back together. it was so much fun to see everyone again. we went out to dinner and mini golfed at trafalga.
back to brandon haha. he is such a great guy and has a very good heart. i think he is exactly what i need in this hard time. and the thing i like about him the most is that we are just friends. niether of us want anything more. idk if thats the thing i like MOST but it sure is a huge thing :] and i like that we can just sit at home and watch a movie and still have fun! he is going to the U and wants to be a doctor because he loves helping others. this kid right here knows exactly how to put a smile on my face and how to make me laugh. im so glad that we have reunited. he is the kind of friend i know will always be there for me. no matter what :]

motherhood

<3

"Motherhood is the most important of all professions that requires more knowledge than any other department in human affairs."

being a mother is the best thing that has ever happened to me.

i love my baby girl so much. she is everything i have wanted and more :)