take a look through my eyes: my princess,

oh my heck!

my daughter is getting so big.

(16 1/2 months)

(beginning of august 2011)

i remember this day so clear!

i had just gotten back from vegas. calvin and i went on a date night to trafalga. we played mini golf, (pretty sure i won:) rode the carrousel and had a fun time. cali liked it too. she was kicking and having fun in my belly :]

32 weeks pregnant.

my pregnancy was the best thing that ever happened to me.

i only threw up a handful of times. and i got big boobies out of it haha.

39 weeks. 1 more to go.

i seriously miss being pregnant. don't get me wrong i am in love with my little girl and i am so glad that she is here with me everyday and i get to teach her to become her own individual. and i do NOT want another baby until i am married and with the person i want to spend forever with (which im not settling cause i know what i want and im going to get it)

but i have been thinking about being a surrogate mother. i would love that. i loved being pregnant and i want to be again. i just don't want the newborn. ha wow that sounded harsh but i would be helping a family. and be getting paid a lot of money. im highly considering it.

october 12, 2011

Cali Jannette Gray

7 lbs 7oz

7:10 am

i didn't know it at the time, but this is the day my life had changed forever.

a little girl sent from up above had just been delivered into my arms. i was chosen to be her mother.

calvin and i had a hard time agreeing on a name for our little girl. i suggested cali and he loved it. i was kind of shocked that he did. in my previous relationship, we picked that name out if we ever got married and had a baby. lol i told calvin that and gladly, he was okay with it. we originally had cali jean gray picked out. i adored it. i knew that was her name. but i really wanted to name her after some one in my family. cali was pretty much after calvin (his family called him cali sometimes) and jean was his mothers middle name. and i was giving cali his last name. so i told him he could pick the first name and i could pick the middle name or vise versa. so he picked cali (even though i originally had picked it:) and jannette is after my grandmother, janet. and my moms middle name annette. jannette.

i could get into the whole pregnancy, labor, and birthing story but i will save that for another day when i have a lot of time to write. but to say the least, it was the best experience of my life.

there is nothing like being a parent...at that, a single parent.

i will say though that i didn't think cali was very cute haha. when she came out i looked at calvin and said "yikes, put her back in" i was obviously joking. cali came out posterior so her head was facing the ceiling instead of the floor. she had a unicorn head instead of a cone/alien head. and honestly, most new borns are not cute at all. and ill be the first to admit that cali wasn't. she was really swollen and her nose was big. but now she sure is a cutie. she has grown into her face and her personality is just the greatest. ♥